Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Disney buys Lucasfilm


You know folks, people are getting into a freaking tizzy over the fact that Disney bought Lucasfilm. While a lot of people have been in support of it (myself included) many more have been pissing, bitching and moaning about the fact that their childhood is ruined.  That the next Star Wars is going to be turned into some sort of princess-filled kid's story that's going to have all the soul sucked out of it.

First of all, our "childhood" was ruined when Lucas let the flannel shirts eat his brain and caused him to alter, re-alter, and re-re-alter his films whenever he got a hard-on for whomp-rats. Getting the franchise out of his grubby little dick-skinners is a good start right off the bat. Disney could hardly rape our childhoods any worse than Lucas has already done with his flannel-covered cock.

Greedo shooting first? What the fuck man?

Secondly we have to remember that this is not Disney's first purchase. First there was Pixar and now we have Lassiter making important decisions like the one to rehire the animation team and to release one traditionally hand-drawn animated film every other year. Granted the tech is improved from onion skin to the new wacom tablets...but it's still hand drawn and the magic is still there. Just look at "The Princess and the Frog" Like or loathe the movie, it was wonderful to see something that had the heart and soul of the animators and brings us back to the days of stunning hand-drawn visuals once again.

For the longest time if you wanted that you had to go to Japanese Anime and Studio Ghibli (Spirited Away, Nausica of the Valley of the Winds, My Neighbor Totoro, Kiki's Delivery Service, Ponyo, etc) to see.

And even looking at just the Pixar side of it, they're *still* making good stuff because Disney knows to let them do what they do best and they'll supply the money and rake in their share of the profits.

Henson Studios sold the Muppet Franchise to Disney because they knew that they would protect and promote them. They're keeping Kermit and Piggy and gang alive when no one else would have given a flying fuck about them.

And most recently in 2009, Disney bought Marvel. So to everyone who says that we're going to see a pussified and child-friendly Star Wars with no action, no adult-level plot...I say this.

Iron Man II
Thor
Captain America

And to really drive the point home...

The Avengers

This is what Disney is capable of. Sure they're built on the foundation of "The Mouse" but when it comes down to gritty, action-packed films...they can and have delivered. BECAUSE...they know how to get the right people for the job (Joss Whedon) and let them do what they need to do. Disney is in it for the money. They bloody well know that the best way to make a boodle of money is to deliver quality product.

And most will say that The Avengers is that.

And finally there is one more point. Back in the 80's I saw a documentary about Star Wars that talked about the fact that Lucas had 9 plotlines done. He had done A New Hope, Empire Strikes Back, and Return of the Jedi. He had plans of doing the prequels and then the sequels. Then after he had finished "Attack of the Clones" he announced that he couldn't be arsed to do episodes 7, 8, and 9 and that he was done after "Revenge of the Sith". Now Disney is saying that they're going to release new films. Wow! Maybe the sequel plots are in the works. Maybe we can finally know what the hell happens next.

So I'm excited about this news. Disney has in the past given me enough proof of what they're capable of and more importantly what they're *willing* to do. This past performance is enough to let me sit back and say "Ok, I'll give you the chance. Show me what you got."

I'm betting on good things.

Sunday, October 28, 2012

Pull the other one, it plays "Jingle Bells"

Ah, someone *else* wanting my World of Warcraft information.


Greetings!

We have already noted that you are trying to sell your personal World of Warcraft or Diablo III account.
Terms of Use 
So "Oh Mighty Blizzard Administrators", which one is it? Am I selling my WoW account, or my Diablo III account. I only have one, only play one, don't even play the free-to-play demo for the other. So if I'm being a naughty boy and am trying to sell one...why don't you tell *me* which one I have and am trying to sell.

This is important for you to get it right as my belief will be colored by what you choose. Chose incorrectly and I'll believe that you're a bunch of stupid fucktards trying to scare me for having an account with Blizzard.net but not knowing which one I do have. Choose correctly and I'll believe that you are a bunch of stupid fucktards trying to scare me for having an account with Blizzard.net but not knowing which one I do have...but who got damn lucky. It's 50/50 odds after all.

And for those watching at home? Blizzard was compromised a little while ago. This is why they required everyone to change their passwords. Anyone with the authenticator was safe. They have since plugged the leaks and closed off the holes.

It will be ongoing for further investigation by Blizzard Entertainment's employees.
If you wish to not get your account suspended you should immediately verify your account ownership. You must complete the steps below to secure the account and your computer. 
English people! English! For pity's sake your fake website has a .tk address so you're either *in* New Zealand, or are one of the many Taiwanese or Korean scammers trying to make money on a computer game and are hosting on NZ servers. In either case, there are PLENTY of people in all three areas that speak English a hell of a lot better than this.

STEP 1: ACCOUNT INVESTIGATION
We now provide a secure website for you to verify that you have taken the appropriate steps to secure the account, your computer, and your email address. Please go to this site and follow the instructions:
http://www.battle.com/support/article/securitywebform 
Boy you fellers could fuck up a wet dream. Not only do you send me to a site that is not anywhere near the Blizzard/Battle.net servers...but you say that I have to go to battle.com which is a holding page for a webhosting company looking to sell that domain.

Buncha dumbasses.

STEP 2: VERIFY YOUR SUBMISSION WAS RECEIVED
We will contact you with further instructions once we have received and processed your submission. If you do not receive a reply within 48 hours of submitting this form, please resend it from the address listed above. 
TRANSLATION: If we don't fuck you in the ass in 2 days, please send us your information a second time so we can try to fuck you in the ass.

Please be aware that if unauthorized access to this account, it may lead to further action against the account. 
What unauthorized access? I have the user name, I have the correct password, I have the nifty spiffy authenticator that keeps people like you from logging in even if you have the password. AND...And I'm not trying to sell the account. Who would buy it? I have no large sums of in-game currency, I have no max-tier-geared toons, I just like running around and running quests. And playing with the Pet Battle system (It's like WoW and Pokemon gor their freak on and this was the love child).

And in any case you threatening me with further action against my account is similar to what Robin Williams said about British Police not having guns. "Stop! Or I'll say "Stop" again.". You have as much power, as much bite as the scenario he paints.
Fare Thee Well, 
Really? No Blizzard employee speaks that way when it comes to the legal terms of the Terms of Agreement.

Game Master Dunarthra
Customer Services
And they only use "in-Game" names when they're resolving an "in-game" issue and are responding to a GM ticket.

Pull the other one...it plays Jingle Bells.

Sorry Rob...didn't feel like using the "Agave Cactus up the ass" bit today. The storm is playing merry hob with my head and just didn't feel like it. I promise next rant I'll put in two to make it up to you so you can have fun making fun of the over-used line.

Friday, October 26, 2012

A political quickie.

To go by the political ads, the Facebook memes, the people *on* Facebook that are so rabidly in support of one candidate or the other (or even a third party candidate)...I have concluded that no matter what I do, I'm un-American.

To date I've seen...

  • If you vote for Obama you're un-American for supporting a non-US Citizen that illegally became President to support Socialism and to convert us all into Muslim extremists. 
  • If you vote for Romney, you're an un-American Mormon supporting douchebag that is going to force gays to go to concentration and reeducation camps to have the homo beaten out of them, keep women barefoot and pregnant (and sharing the bedroom with a bazillion other "wives"), and are voting in support of letting the rich butt-fuck the poor whenever they need to rub one out. 
  • If you vote for a third party candidate, you're un-American because you're taking votes away from the Dirty Commie or from the filthy Polygamist who deserve them more because you're voting for these unwashed hippies.
  • If you don't vote at all you're un-American for well not wanting to take your rightful place in the 300 million-plus Americans doing their patriotic duty by picking the shiniest of the turds presented. 
So I have to ask. With these four statements flying around the internet in forms that may or may not be as exaggerated as I've presented here (and trust me, I've *seen* far worse)...

What must I do to be seen as a "True, Red-Blooded American"? Seriously! What do I have to do? Pull the ghost of Washington out of my ass? Go back in time and give Lincoln a handjob so we can clone him? What?

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Product Reviews.

I'm getting to the point where I'm convinced that product reviews are written by people who have no idea on how to be honest with a product's description and their experiences.

Look at some product reviews. Either they're "OMG! This was the awesomest thing on the planet EVAR!" or "Oh dear lord this product couldn't be worse if it was pulled from Satan's own backed-up septic tank after Hell's annual Chili Cook-off."

With few reviews in between.

We went to a hotel in Williamsburg Va., and it was an older, very dated and run down hotel. My honest review on Trip Advisor read thus...


Seriously, the worst thing I can say about the hotel was that it is old and it shows. The rooms are dark thanks to the dark wood paneling that was popular when the hotel was built (my guess would be 60's-70's), the plaster is sporting some discoloration, and the fixtures are a bit dated. 
But that's the worst I can say about it. 
The staff was very friendly, the room was clean, the linens smelled fresh, and the price was reasonable for a weekend rate. 
Pros - The room is clean, the water is hot and plentiful, the location is pretty centralized to most of the attractions in Williamsburg and the rates are reasonable. 
Cons - The rooms are old and it shows, the mattress is firmer than I like it, but not so firm as to be uncomfortable, and due to a sticking lock we had to take a handicapped accessable room so I got stuck with a low mounted shower head (I'm 6'2 and this was set at 5'0) and we had the toilet with the elevated seat.
This would not be my first choice on my next trip to Williamsburg, but if money is an issue or nothing else in our pricerange is available...I'd not hesitate to come here again.
 Which is an honest assessment of the room. Everything I described in the review reflects on what we experienced in our stay there. The hotel is getting a little long in the tooth, but is well managed and kept as well as can be expected without doing a full renovation.

To hear what others were saying, one would think that this place was roach-infested, crack-whore central with the police banging on doors and arresting some drug-dealer or prostitute at all hours of the morning.

Saw one cricket, no police ever showed up, no scary individuals...Hell, the strangest thing we saw was a father and his kid (who also went to Busch Gardens) trying to catch a skink that was running around on the stairs.

Another area of interesting product reviews are the people who give a product a bad review based on something that is not the manufacturer's fault. Like one review for a computer monitor. It came in defective and they yelled bloody blue murder about how the company is a bunch of incompetent fuck-tards. What was wrong with the monitor you ask? There was a big boot print in the packaging when the unit arrived.

Now considering that the manufacturer isn't going to want the publicity of shipping damaged equipment, the odds are that this was done during transit. Either from an accident or some employee having a bad day and taking it out on random boxes.

The kicker? The review stated that the replacement sent from Tiger Direct worked perfectly, but they still gave it 1 out of 5 on every category. Yes, even though TD said "Damn that sucks! Here, send us the damaged one back and we'll overnight a replacement at no charge to you." they bashed and bad mouthed the product as if there was a design flaw that caused the units to spontaneously manifest size-12 boot prints in the screen.

Recipe reviews are another fun category. This is the one that really makes me weep for the species. Now the missus and I are looking for new recipe ideas for dinners. Especially slow-cooker meals that we can make on the road when we get the Teardrop Camper built. Now it's fine to post opinions on such reviews. Saying that the recipe is a little bland means that people who love cooking with spices and herbs may want to taste it while it's cooking to see where such can be added to impart more flavor. Someone who reports that it's too spicy for them serves as a warning to people who are a little bit of a spice wimp that they might want to cut down on the hot stuff. Even things like "I didn't have "X" and so I substituted "Y" and it came out tasty" serves to help people who might likewise not be able to get a hold of "X" but want to still try it.

But what you actually get are a bunch of people who say "I tried the Chicken Marsala recipe but didn't have the mushrooms or the Marsala Wine (so I used vodka), and didn't have Olive Oil (substituted Vegetable Oil) and it didn't taste good at all."

Anyone who knows anything about cooking would see the mistakes right off the bat. Anyone who doesn't know cooking would at least surmise that if you don't have the ingredients called for in a recipe, you're not going to get the same results.

Olive oil has more flavor than bland old vegetable oil. Hell vegetable oil is frequently used because it has almost no flavor impact on a food. And the three defining things about Chicken Marsala are the 'shrooms, the chicken and the Marsala wine. Eliminate two out of the three and you ain't got Chicken Marsala.

Now it is possible in this recipe to use a dry red wine instead of the Marsala, it won't be Chicken Marsala, but it would still be pretty tasty. But cutting out the 'shrooms and using vodka and then saying that it "didn't taste good at all" and then blaming the recipe for it (and giving it half a star on the review)...what's your thinking?

This the kind of person who would write Chrysler and complain "My Dodge Truck ran like shit after I got drunk and drove it into a tree. You make crappy products."

eBay feedback is another fun area. This is one of those areas where if the transaction goes well everyone screams "A+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++" until they run out of characters in the feedback area, or they belittle the seller if the product is not as awesome as they imagined.

I bought some used books from a chap on eBay recently. 98% positive review with a few negative ones. Let me check the negative reviews. Hrm..."Book was not in new condition...he LIED TO ME!!!" on a book that was listed in "Fair" condition with dents and dings on the hard cover, paper yellowed with age and other signs of a well cared for likewise well used and old copy of the Dungeons and Dragons Player Handbook.

Then we have "It took me two weeks to get the books after I ordered them" This one concerned me until I saw that the seller was in California and the buyer was in Ramstein Germany (my guess son of US Air Force Personnel stationed there). It took two weeks to go halfway around the planet using the least expensive shipping method so the seller didn't sell his book at a loss? Consider yourself lucky punk.

Or on a current transaction of mine. Guy complained "7 days returns HE DID not return$$$$$ after sold me JUNK". The reply from the seller was "Buyer Wanted REFUND before Item was Returned, MUST RETURN ITEM FIRST then Refund".

Which is eBay's advice to sellers. Don't ship until money clears, don't refund until product is returned.

So I've learned to read between the lines when it comes to reviews. Eliminate all the "This was the mostest awesomest thing in the whole wide world!!!" reviews, eliminate the "OMFG This was the suxxors!!!" reviews and read the ones that seem to be written by people who are capable of actually saying why something was good or why it was bad...

And to be able to do so using a reasonable grasp on the English Language. I'm not expecting Shakespearean Dialog or "The Queen's English"...but for fuck's sake hopefully you can do better than "FIRE BAD!"

Monday, October 15, 2012

I love a slow cooker.

You can make so many easy to prepare meals that are damn tasty.

Cheesy Brat Stew

There are no phases in this one because this one is a true drop, go, come home and eat recipe.

6 Bratwurst links browned and cut into 1/2 inch slices.
4 Medium Russet Potatoes peeled and cubed.
1 Small Sweet Onion peeled and chopped (more on sweet onions later)
1 Can of French Cut Green Beans (Drained)
1 Small to Medium Red Bell Pepper seeded and chopped.
1 Carrot sliced thin
2 Cups Shredded Cheddar Cheese
1 can Cream of Mushroom Soup
2/3 cup water.

Drop it all in to a slow cooker, set to medium and cook it for three hours or until the potatoes are fork-tender.

Yup. It's that simple. Drop it, cook it, serve it, eat it. We tried it this past weekend and It didn't need anything else. It was hearty, filling and just damn tasty. A lot of our recipes are evolved concoctions. We take the original recipe and say "Ooh! It needs..." or "Hrm...there's too much..." and we'll tweak it for the next go around. Eventually (like the previously mentioned Potato Soup) we get it to the point where we're happy with it and call it a recipe for the book.

This time we were totally happy with it straight off the page and into the soup pot.

Sweet onions. So far I've failed to see a point in buying plain yellow onions. They're very strong, they're pungent, and there is nothing that they can do that a sweet onion can do better. White onions have their place, Red Onions are the go to onion for salads and sandwiches...but when you're talking soups, stews, or even fried into onion rings or your own "bloomin' onion"...a sweet will just be that much more awesome.

Largely because they lack the high amount of sulfur compounds and have a higher water content than the yellows.

And it doesn't matter (much) which ones you get. Texas, Sweetie Sweets, Vidalias...they're pretty much the same and equally do a good job.  The nice thing is with so many varieties, we can get them year 'round.

With the bell pepper, a lot of people avoid them because they hear Red Pepper and think "Hotter than balls!" thanks to the other red pepper (the chili pepper) and avoid it. That couldn't get much further from the truth if you tried.

Red Bell peppers are simply the more mature form of the Green Bell Pepper. The greens are at their earliest stages of being ripe and so are less sweet and a little more bitter than the Orange and the Red varieties. As they develop their color, they lose a lot of the bitter and store more sugar for the seeds.

Also Bell Peppers do not have the capsaicin that other peppers have. And if you really want to get all of the bitter out, remove any of the white stuff in the pepper. In other peppers that and the seeds are where the heat is so you can reduce the strength of the bite in other peppers that way.

So don't skip the pepper in the recipe above. It imparts a nice flavor, adds no heat or a bite to the stew and just works out well.

Sunday, October 14, 2012

I got bored.

I got bored with my blog as it currently stands. I feel the need to do something different. I still plan on posting all the stupid things that I encounter and to make my rants here when I feel the need to do so...

But I find that while I'm surrounded by the stupid, not all of it is blog worthy and my posts have diminished considerably.

That and the Nigerian Scammers are getting lazy. Used to be I'd get these wonderful poorly written essays on why it sucks to be them and why I should be grateful for a chance to help them out and get some of that "Phat Cash" I'm helping them smuggle/embezzle/steal/keep out of the hands of bastard relatives/etc.

Now It's "Contact me for a financial opportunity".

Bo-ring!

So it's time to use this blog for more things. To lighten it up and chronicle interesting things like new recipies that the wife and I experiment with. Comments on the positive things that happen in the world as well as the negative. To boldly go where every other blogger has gone before!

Cue Star Trek music

So to start off....

Many of my friends (and several family members) have tried the evolved concoction that is our Potato Soup. With the exception of the extremely picky eaters (how you cook for that man Steffie I'll never know), everyone has stated that it is awesome to the extreme.

So I'm posting the recipe now that it's getting around to cold weather season and a hearty soup/stew is always a good thing.

Potato Soup

This can be done in the slow cooker or on the stove top depending on the time you have. Either works equally well and it all depends on whether you're willing to wait or want it ready within an hour of getting home.


  • Phase 1 - The soup base
    • 6 Potatoes, peeled and chopped.
    • 1 cup chopped Onion
    • 2 Carrots thinly sliced.
    • 4 cups Chicken Broth (now you can use stock or if you have a quality bouillon and not that uber-hard cube of nearly pure salt you can use that to make the broth)
    • 1 tsp Basil
    • 1 tsp Oregano
    • 1 tsp Thyme
    • 1 tsp Salt (Don't skip this ingredient. Salt in moderation is fine and potatoes need salt to enhance their flavor)
    • 1/2 tsp Ground Black Pepper
    • 1 leftover Ham Bone (optional, but trust me on this...freeze and save that Christmas Ham Bone)
    • Real Bacon (optional but highly suggested if you don't have a ham bone - Heck! Put in both for even more flavor)
  • Phase 2 - The thickening and final cook
    • 1/4 cup All-Purpose Flour
    • 1-1/4 cup Light Cream or Half-n-Half
    • 1/2 pound package of Ham Cubes
  • Phase 3 - Serving and Garnish
    • Real Bacon Bits (optional)
    • Shredded Cheddar (optional - sharper the better but Colby, or any really flavorful cheese works nicely)
Phase 1 - Combine Potatoes, Onion, Carrots, Broth Salt, Herbs, Pepper, ham bone (if you have one) in a slow cooker or pot on the stove (set both for high) and cook until veggies are tender. This takes roughly three hours in a slow cooker.

If you don't have a ham bone, you can chop up some bacon and boil it with the rest of the ingredients. Both the Ham Bone and/or the Bacon are there simply to impart flavor into the stew. 

Phase 2 - Once the veggies are tender, remove the ham bone and large chunks of meat (the boiling processes strips most of the flavor out of the ham and/or bacon) and go on to the next step.

Combine flour and cream/half-n-half and mix until all the lumps are gone and stir into soup. Add the ham cubes (optional) and continue cooking for another 30 minutes.

Phase 3 - Serve with bacon bits and shredded cheese and enjoy.